dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
