i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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