we're blogging at a bar
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize