Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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