Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
