this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
