i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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