It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
