i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
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an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
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I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.