I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
