lets start a swedish sibling band together
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
