No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
