: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
