I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
sarcasm needs its own font
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
