my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
