you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
