I need help removing her.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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