This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
