You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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