Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I did not marry a roomba.
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