she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?