She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
i think i just lost a toe
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
