We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I just had sex on a roof
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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