Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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