Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
vagina is talking i cant
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
