i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
