adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize