stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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