singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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