Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
