I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize