well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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