why didn't you poke me back
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
