You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
