Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
