what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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