Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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