I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
