just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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