he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Randomize
