Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My butt remains clenched, sir.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
