he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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