WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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