when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
