Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
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Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
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Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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