do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
