we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
