TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
