If that was your dad, he is hot
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
