And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
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Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
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Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica