I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
