yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
