the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
